I've known of more death in this past calendar year than at any other time in my life. Death really gives you a fresh perspective on eternity, doesn't it? Well, at least it should.
My mind has been stretched lately regarding where my true faith and hope lies. I found that it's easy to say I believe and trust that God is truly in control, but then life in this sinful world creeps in and snatches up certainties we thought we had on lock.
All I can really do in each moment is praise God for the gifts he's given today. All I can do is trust that he is Sovereign and in complete control of life's circumstances. I have to trust that anything that happens, happens for a reason... for His glory and my ultimate good. I have to believe that He is sanctifying me for Himself and for the good works in which He created me to fulfill. I have to believe that what others may have intended for evil, God works for good.
So what does that look like today?
Well, whatever I eat (and feed others), whatever I drink (and serve others), and whatever I do (for myself and others), do it all for the glory of Him who made me.
Since you ordained all of my days before one of them came to be (Psalm 139:16b), I want to honor you with the gift of life you've bestowed on me. Make my life a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to you.
"Oh Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You discern my going out and my lying down. You are familiar with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, you know it completely, O LORD. You hem me in behind and before. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens you are there. If I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me. Your right hand will hold me fast..." Psalm 139:1-10
I cannot go anywhere away from your presence, Oh LORD. In your presence there is true JOY. There can be no "bad days" knowing that whatever my circumstances you are with me, Lord.
"When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider this: God has made the one as well as the other. Therefore, no one can discover anything about their future." Ecclesiastes 7:14
I confess that sinful fear and anxiety have crept into my mind this year, God. I confess that I haven't always trusted that the plans you have for me are good. I have sinned against a Holy God by desiring things that aren't of you... by putting my trust in things of this world that I think will satisfy my craving to be filled up. I have put my trust in financial comfort, physical contentment, a healthy body and healthy choices or lack of them. I have put my trust in order and routines, in quiet and solitude. I have put my trust in pleasures of this world rather than the creator and lover of my heart, mind and soul. I have loved being in control, planning trips, buying things, organizing life, and boasting about what I know.
My only boast should be in Christ's finished work on the cross, and his free gift to me.
Lord, God. Help me to love you. Help me to exemplify (through the power of the Holy Spirit), the fruit and evidence of a changed life that seeks to glorify you daily. Teach me to die to myself and my desires. Teach me to put the needs of others ahead of my own. Teach me to be filled by every word that comes from you, so that I may pour out to those around me with boundless giving!
Teach me to seek you and your kingdom first. Help me to hide your words in my heart that I might not sin against you. Keep me content in all things, my Lord and Savior. I ask these things with a humble heart, my Lord and God.
Amen.
